BPD and Splitting (Posted on August 30, 2019)









This is something I recently learned about myself and my BPD. It is what has done the most damage to my self and the ones I care most about. I give props to Kati for making this video explaining that it’s not just about the anger outwards but inwards most of all.
The biggest factor in BPD is self-loathing, shame, and guilt that is never-ending and hidden when a person, specifically in this case myself splits, we project the anger we feel towards ourselves onto the person we sudden perceived as the bad guy relieving us of the blame, or other negative inward emotions.

Getting Personal

Very recently with me dealing with being quite ill I have been splitting toward my boyfriend and haven’t been speaking with him, pushing him away, because he is trying to “get me out of my head” and when I attempt to apologize it doesn’t go as planned and I “spin out” so I am becoming avoidant. He will read this. Recently he sent me this to remind me about how I am when I am not “spinning out” (a term we use for when I am splitting)
Right now I am not splitting but being avoidant which is a whole other blog.
There isn’t much of a positive up swing to this blog, but I can say I know there are treatment options for people with BPD and it’s not the end. DBT, Dialectical behavior therapy is the best treatment for those suffering. If you watch this and you happen to relate, there is help.
You can be the best you for yourself and those you care about, care for yourself as much as those who care for you and you can do it. Thank you for being here.

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